Looks like JP has tagged me with one of these blogger quizes, so I guess I'm obligated to participate. Apparently, I'm supposed to come up with five things about myself that I haven't written about before. I'd much rather answer some actual questions, but I'll play along anyway.
1. I once worked as a "hot walker" at Belmont Racetrack. This entailed waking up at 4:30 a.m. every morning to work over at Freeman Barns at the track. It was my responsibility to walk an assigned horse around a ring, make sure it got enough water, and then hose down the horse's front legs before walking him back to the stable.
My father, who is an absolute racing fan, was pretty jazzed that I got this job, as he had visions that I'd actually like it, and embark on a career as a trainer. The reality, of course, was far different. Hitting work at 5:00 a.m. on a regular basis would be a challenge for most 15-year old kids. Given the fact that my interest in horse racing was not nearly as intense as my father's, it was a brutal experience.
As many of you might have already surmised, I'm not exactly a barnyard type of guy. It didn't help when I discovered that thoroughbred race horses are perhaps some of the nastiest domesticated animals on earth. It all came to an end one morning when the horse I was given to walk -- unbeknownest to anyone -- had developed a case of colic. Needless to say, he was a pretty nasty customer that day, and after he reared up on his hind legs like Trigger, I decided that I'd seen enough of the horse business for one lifetime.
2. My Dad and I actually met O.J. Simpson. It was, I kid you not, while we were returning a rental car to Hertz at San Francisco International Airport the day after Super Bowl XIX. O.J. just popped out of the car ahead of us, and we walked up and said hello.
And to think, we could have changed history right there...
3. I have many nicknames: Mac, Big Mac and e-Mac. I guess I shouldn't forget Skippy. It was the Summer of 1987, I was 19, she was 26 and took me sailing. My roommate at the time wasn't going to let me live it down, hence, I was Skippy for about 2 months.
I'll just leave it at that.
4. I once heckled Ben Vereen. I was convinced I actually wrote about this before, but I just checked my archives and I couldn't find it, so here goes...
It was my sophomore year in high school, and one of my teachers organized an after school trip to see the Xmas Tree lighting at Rockefeller Center in Manhattan. In those days, the local NBC affiliate in New York produced a 30-minute Xmas special that culminated with the lighting of the tree. There was usually a musical number or two and some figure skating before the big finale.
That year, our group of teenage reprobates had staked out a spot right in front of the tree on the plaza above the ice rink. Just beyond the tree was a stone wall, and atop the wall on either side of the tree were a pair of television monitors where we could watch the show hosted by -- you guessed it -- the multi-talented Ben Vereen.
Most of the time, the image on both televisions was the same. But when Ben threw the broadcast to somebody else, one of the monitors would follow that person, while the other stayed focused on Ben.
It was during one of these segments that it became clear that Ben was a little uncomfortable, and he started to wiggle his nose a little bit. It was clear that a booger had come loose, and it was irritating Ben to no end.
Try as he might, Ben just couldn't get comfortable. Which is when he slowly raised his index finger toward his nose...
Sure, the folks at home might have been focused on the figure skating, but all of us there could see that Ben was going to pick his nose on camera -- a major league faux pas if there ever was one.
It was clear Ben was unaware of the peril he was in. So I took it upon myself to warn him.
I shouted, "NO BEN, DON'T DO IT!" But still the index finger rose toward his nose.
But now that I had raised the alarm, others decided to join in -- including a classmate of mine, Mike McGarvey. Mike was a pretty typical wise-ass Irish Catholic kid who took it upon himself to rally the crowd to warn Ben. Before you knew it, the entire plaza had erupted in shouts urging Vereen not to pick his nose.
But it was to no avail. And once the index finger reached its target, the entire crowd let out a tremendous sigh of disappointment.
Which was exactly the moment that Ben finally realized what was going on. Caught in the act, he played along, making sure to laugh it off as he flicked the booger from his finger. What a pro.
5. For some reasons, Irish Catholics who don't know me terribly well like to tell me Italian jokes. I always play along and make sure to laugh it up -- all the way through mentioning that my mother's family is Sicilian and I know where they live...
